Riding the Empire Builder really is the best way to travel

Riding the train is totally underrated.

Honestly, after riding the train for the first time earlier this month, I’m not convinced airplanes were an improvement. 

Trains have so much more to offer than airplanes, although what they don’t have is also an improvement compared to their winged counterparts. 

Gone are the rude flight attendants.

No more invasive security checks.

And you almost never have to sit next to a fat guy who uses both armrests.

I’ll admit that I spent most of my time sleeping across a row of semi-adjustable seats while taking Amtrak’s Empire Builder to Bismarck and back. It was there, stretched out at my full span of 6-feet, 2-inches, that I recognized the superiority of trains over all other forms of transportation.

But it was also a pleasure being awake on the train. You can just sit there and read. Or type on your computer. Or watch movies. Or visit the dining car for a sit-down meal.

And there is so much space – at least there was on my trip – that you don’t have to talk to anybody the entire time, which I prefer over trying to make small talk with someone who has nothing in common with me. 

Even crying babies are no problem on a train. You just grab your stuff, move to a different car (without a crying baby) and enjoy the quietness. 

Nobody seems to care if you stumble aimlessly from one car to the next as the train hurls itself from side to side at 60 miles per hour. People dressed in railroad uniforms will even ask whether you would like a beer to go with your stoll.

When you start feeling restless – on a 15-hour trip, it’s inevitable – you just go outside with the smokers at the next stop along the route. For some reason, it can be reassuring to put your feet on the ground periodically during a long trip, even if you have to endure a little secondhand smoke.

Not one, but two whole cars on the train serve food – anytime you want it. Well, you might have to get dinner reservations in the dining car. And breakfast might be served at a table that includes several strangers due to something the train-intercom operator calls “community seating.”

But if your plans to get a restaurant-style meal go wrong, just head to the café car and load up on junk food and yogurt. The lady who runs the café car on the Friday morning shift heading east might even let you have a free pair of headphones if you forget yours at home.

It is also possible to be somewhat productive on a train. I’ve tried for years to write stories or columns on airplanes, but it seems like there is always something disquieting going on that keeps me from accomplishing anything.

There are no choices on planes, and I think that’s the worst part. You don’t choose who sits by you. You can’t avoid crying babies. You sometimes have to sit right next to the bathroom. And there’s always a chance your luggage will arrive in Miami when your body arrives in Denver.  

Plus, if you are more than six feet tall, just sitting in one of those absurdly small seats for more than an hour can cause serious physical trauma. Neck aches. Back pain. Leg cramps. Trust me; it’s not pretty.

In the end, I paid less than $175 for a roundtrip ticket that took me a total of 775 miles. By plane, it would have been $800 or more. By car, it would have been more than $200 in just gas alone.

The entire experience, coming from someone who has made countless trips in airplanes, was truly awesome. I now believe trains are, hands down, the best way to travel.

Next time, though, I think I’ll try the sleeper car. I have no idea what those look like on the inside, but the name has a definite appeal to it.

(Matt Bunk is publisher of The Western News. His column appears weekly.)